Simplify Your Life

The more simple we can make our lives, the easier it is to stay connected to Source energy and disconnected from the ego-mind. The modern-day complexities that cause stress, anxiety, worry, and fear are mostly man-made and are not indicative of "real" danger. Our brains evolved to shift into "flight or fight" mode for survival while living in incredibly dangerous environments with threats around every corner. The modern lives we live, typically don't have those same types of threats, but our minds are still putting our bodies in a fight or flight response even though the threats are less real and more perceived. Let's look at some examples:

Prehistoric threats:	Modern day threats:
Being hunted by a predator	Being late to meetings or appointments - being too busy
Starving after being outcasted by your tribe	Disappointing friends or family
Being challenged by an external group or an internal rival	Falling behind on to-do lists, chores, or various obligations

The biggest difference in these types of threats is that the first column are real threats that are actually happening, physically present, and can result in real harm or death. Versus, the second column that are problems invented by society, our egoic brains, and do not impact real physical safety - you will not die as a result of any of them. So, let's thank our brains for keeping our ancestors safe during times of peril! Say it with me, "thank you, brain, for helping my people survive such a tumultuous scary world. I am alive today because of the tactics you used to keep them safe." And together, we can work towards eliminating the modern day perceived threats and avoid entering a state of fight or flight mode.

I find water to be incredibly calming - it helps me regulate my nervous system faster.

I remember many years ago listening to a presentation done by Lisa Marini, who is now my brain coach and who I would highly recommend working with. She is an expert on this subject and has helped me tremendously! During this first presentation I attended, she asked the audience if we were "stressed." To which, I responded, "No! Of course not!" She then had us close our eyes and think about the physical symptoms of being stressed, such as:

• Shallow breathing

• Shoulders tense and up by your ears

• Tightness in your muscles, especially your neck

• Having a difficult time sleeping through the night

• Feeling agitated or frustrated easily, like having road rage

Well… it turned out I was VERY stressed! It is so common for modern day humans to live in a constant state of stress, where our nervous systems are consistently in hyper drive, oftentimes without even realizing it. I suggest you take an inventory right now. Do you feel stressed? Are you experiencing any of these symptoms? Are any of these symptoms chronically ongoing?

It is not healthy for our bodies to live in a constant state of fight or flight mode. This is what causes chronic stress which can lead to high blood pressure, the formation of artery-clogging deposits, and can contribute to anxiety, depression, and addiction. These physical symptoms are real and can drastically impact your life, and potentially lead to more stress. They cycle is never ending.

So how do we combat entering a "fight or flight" response when we are faced with everyday challenges? There are several strategies, but I would argue that the more we can simplify our lives and simplify our approach to problems the less likely we are going to put ourselves into a stress-response mode. Let's first start with some basic techniques to get your body out of fight or flight and into a calm relaxed state:

• Breath! Take long concentrated breaths, inhaling fully and exhaling for even longer. Fully enlarge your belly and breath in to the very bottom of your torso, hold your breath (count as long as you can, aiming for at least 4 seconds), and then slowly exhale until you are fully emptied out. Do this until you feel your nervous system calming down.

  • I recommend setting aside at least 10 minutes a day to concentrate on breathing, which is a form of meditation.

• Exercise! A lot of people find success in reducing stress with physical exercise. This can be intense cardio or weight-lifting, but can also be more simple like taking a walk. Personally, I enjoy a yoga class (bonus points if it's hot!) because it reduces my stress via physical movement AND focuses on breath work. Any sort of exercise will do, and will help move those stress hormones around and relieve muscle tension.

• Connect with nature! Humans are part of nature. Surrounding yourself with plants, trees, water, rocks, etc. is a great way to calm down and find harmony.

• Emotional connections! Call a friend, meet a loved one for a cup of coffee, go over to a family member's house impromptu - the more we lean into our social connections during times of stress the more likely we are to get the emotional support that can alleviate anxiety and tension.

Now that you're feeling calmer, we can dig into the cause of the stress or worry and begin eliminating the chance of going into a fight or flight response in the future. Many times, the main cause of our problems is our own egoic mind. It is easy to overthink, put unnecessary stress and worry in our lives, and to over analyze situations (past or present).

However, if we can simplify our lives and train our brain to stay present, the problems disappear. 

Our culture promotes being busy, celebrates overworking, and normalizes stressful environments. It is common for individuals to have packed schedules, lots of deadlines to manage, and to feel overwhelmed at work or at home. But, we are in control of our lives! And we have the power to break away from these societal norms. I suggest listing out the main things that are causing you stress / anxiety / worry. Then review each item and decide if you can lessen the burden by either eliminating it completely or putting a boundary up to reduce the stressor.

For example, let's say your calendar stresses you out - you have too many meetings in a day, followed by too many obligations after work. You barely have time to breathe, go to the bathroom, or do a form of self-care, and it's hard to get your actual work done with the number of commitments you have in a day. Review your meetings and prioritize which ones are absolutely necessary. Decline the ones that are irrelevant or aren't contributing positively to your day. You can propose an alternative cadence (maybe you can meet monthly instead of weekly), or shorten the meeting (can a 30-minute meeting actually be only 15 minutes?). Start to create blocks of "no meeting" times and hold true to them. This is your commitment to yourself, this is a boundary you are setting for your health and well-being. You can do it!

Remember, you are in control of your life, of your destiny. It's time to really pay attention to your body so that you can calm your nervous system. It's time to take inventory of what's causing you stress and do everything you can to eliminate or lessen the intensity of the situation. It's okay to say "no," or to take a break, or to ask for an extension on a deadline. It's okay to set a boundary (at work, at home, with loved ones, etc.) so that you can better regulate your nervous system, simplify your life, and feel more at peace. You deserve a calm, easy, simple, harmonious life.